481 | Singing in Your Home (Sean Allen)
Show Notes:
It's sad to say but family singing is very nearly a lost art. We just don't sing anymore and it shows. Waltz into your local congregation and listen to the quality of the singing - it can be painful. But this could quickly be turned around if we sang more in our homes and just as importantly it instills in your children a joy and a sense of togetherness that cannot be replicated by any other pastime.
About Sean
Sean Allen is the founder of The Well Ordered Homeschool, husband to his beautiful bride Caroline and a proud father of eight. He has a bachelor of fine arts in graphic design and is passionate about creating materials to assist parents in the incredibly challenging, yet surpassingly beautiful, work of schooling and training their children at home.
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Show Transcript:
Sean Allen Hello. Welcome to the Homeschool Solutions Show. My name is Sean Allen and I am one of the many hosts here on the podcast. Since you're listening to this, I'm guessing you already know that homeschooling is both incredibly challenging and incredibly beautiful. Every week we're here doing a little guidance, some helpful counsel, and a whole lot of encouragement your way as you navigate this busy, yet blessed journey of educating your children at home. Now, even though the show is called Homeschool Solutions, it should come as no surprise to you that we do not have the answer to every homeschool related question. But if you come away with nothing else, our hope is that today's episode will point you to Jesus Christ and that you will seek His counsel as you train your children in the way they should go. And now on to today's show.
Well hello everyone, it has been some time hasn't it? It's been a while and I'm sorry about that. That has been entirely my fault. I have not been able to get around to recording these episodes as I should, and I want to say it again in no uncertain terms, the people who produce this podcast are wonderful to work with. They are so incredibly patient. They should have kicked me off a long time ago but they didn't. But I'm grateful that they didn't but I'll put it to you this way—they have not given off a whiff of frustration with me, which is remarkable. Maybe they are, and I don't know it, but I haven't sensed it in the least. They've been so kind and generous with me. But I put myself in their shoes and I feel so bad for them and also I think I was getting upset at myself, how about that, on their behalf? So if that gives you any indication of what we're dealing with here. But again, so wonderful to work with, but that being said, we have decided that I should move on because I'm doing too much and I'm not giving my all to the things that I think that I need to be doing. This is one thing that has to be let go of. So I'm going to be going five more episodes and then that will be the end of my run here on the Homeschool Solutions Show, but again, very, very thankful and grateful for the opportunity and I hope that it's been useful to someone out there.
What I wanted to talk to you about today is something that might seem a little strange to you, but I think it's very, very important. The more I think about it, the more important it becomes. And I see the blessing that it has been in the life of my family and that is singing in your home. Singing in your home. I don't know if you've noticed this—I've picked up on this after it having dawned on me how important singing in your home is—if you ever watch any old movies, you'll notice that there's a lot more singing in those movies than what you find today. There's no singing in movies today. I mean, there's a musical every now and then, but the way that it used to be, that was just everyday life. And I remember watching some documentaries on Mennonites and Amish and they're always singing, especially when they're working together. The women are singing in the kitchen. The men are singing out in the fields. The men were singing as they're putting up buildings. And I don't think that's just exclusive to them. I think that that really is a tradition in our society that has largely been lost. And I just think it's so remarkable to recognize that. And furthermore, the movies themselves, people liked musicals a lot more back then. Or even if you were to see a TV show from 40, 50 years ago, they would often find a way to shoehorn in some music into the... like people liked that. They liked seeing people sing. They liked hearing music. And today, not so much.
I don't know if you're watching any television or anything on the streaming services. I wouldn't recommend that you do, but I doubt that you see any singing in them. There's a lot of macabre death and destruction and just all sorts of other horrible things, but you don't see any singing. And so I just wanted to make note of that. And I've seen the blessing of singing in our home. It is a true blessing to your children. Not only is it a blessing to you children, it is a blessing to the people around you, because that's something else that you will notice in worship settings, in the churches all across the land, is that we're not good at singing anymore. It's gotten very bad at times. You'll come into a congregation and it's just like, oh, so bad. So bad and that's just because they never grew up singing. Their families didn't sing and they didn't teach their children the hymns and they're passing it on from generation to generation. That doesn't mean that they don't like the music. That does not mean that they don't like hymns. They do. Many people, they do. They love it. They love to hear it but they're not participating. You see their mouths moving but there's hardly any sound coming out and that's just because they were never taught. They don't have a tradition of singing in their home.
And so I would highly recommend that you start doing this. You might think to yourself like, oh, we're terrible. We can't even carry a tune in a bucket. It's like, well, that doesn't matter. I went to an assembly one time that was... I visited it for about a week and it was in Amish country. It was not an Amish assembly, but there were many traditions in this assembly that I think were derived from the Amish tradition, Mennonite tradition. And it was full of people and I'll tell you that is the most powerful experience musically that I have ever had in a service just for the sheer volume of it. It was unbelievable and I realize now I was surrounded by people who grew up singing all the time. And you know, just as it is with anything else, the more you do it, the better you get at it. That doesn't mean that you're going to turn into professional singers. Maybe you will, maybe you won't. That's another thing is that you're selling your children short. You might have a golden voice in that home and you don't even know it because you're not singing.
Oh, I'm sorry about that. We have this dinging. I just love the dinging. The noises, the notifications. I'm not a big text message guy. I am not. Actually, I hate it. I know it's useful. I know that it's very convenient and I've taken advantage of it as well. I also dislike talking on the phone. Dislike it very much. So I would rather be in front of you. I want to see you. I want to see your expressions. That's how I speak to people. That's why it's very difficult for me to do podcasts by the way. You might not have picked this up. If you haven't, I'm glad about that, but I struggle with these because I don't have anybody in front of me. I want a person here, I want to talk to somebody. But anyway, so I apologize for the dinging, the notifications, it's just non-stop. Sometimes I don't even know how to turn them off. I think I've got it turned off now. Anyway, so singing in your home, yeah. You might have someone who just has such a beautiful... They could sing those dulcet tones and it's just gorgeous, you know, so smooth, so clear, so powerful, so in tune, so emotional. You might have that in your home and you would never know it if you're not singing.
So how are you going to go about doing this? Well, it would really help if you have an instrument, and if you don't, it's okay. But if you do, if you have a piano in particular, and someone who can play the piano, oh my goodness, that's amazing because you can gather around the piano and sing. And my wife likes to pick out a hymn a month to learn and to really learn it. You know, you can sing the melody, but then when you learn all the different parts, and you discover that you've got an alto, you've a soprano, you've got a bass, you've got a tenor, if you have multiple children. Or if the father could sing one line and the mother could sing another line and you have a child that could sing... That just makes it all the more richer when you discover that. That will just supercharge it. And then you can't get enough singing at that point. And I've noticed that some of my children are like that. It's like reading. They love being read to aloud, and they can't get enough of it. And singing is that way too.
See, I didn't grow up like this. I didn't grow up like this. Now, my father could sing and he could sing very well. And I had some family members who were very musical, but we didn't sing in our family. And so I still get a little uncomfortable at times and my children will scold me. Like, "Dad, why aren't you singing?" It's just because I didn't grow up like that but that doesn't mean that I don't see the value of it. And I do participate at times and I do enjoy it very, very much. Now, Caroline, her family, they did grow up like that. And that is why my family sings because they grew up singing. That was one of their favorite pastimes. I kid you not. You talk about sitting down and watching a TV show or watching a movie or, you know... We were big into sports. We'd go outside and throw a ball or something and I loved that. I enjoyed that very much and there's something to be said about that. But their favorite thing to do was gather around the piano and sing. So when I got to know Caroline, I'd go over to her house and they'd be like, let's sing. I was like, "Huh? Okay." And you could tell they were just all, her entire family... not her father, but you know that's alright, but her mother and her sister and herself in particular, they loved that. And they would sing song after song after song, and I would go over there and try to sing too. Just an amazing thing.
So yeah, if you have a piano, if you have an instrument. If you don't have a piano, but you have a piano player, you can get an electronic instrument for cheap. It's not gonna sound as nice of course, but it doesn't matter. That's one thing. Or if you have someone who can play a guitar to kind of carry the chorus or undergird the group singing, that could be very, very nice. But even if you don't have an instrument or a person who could play an instrument, you can just sing acapella. It doesn't matter. You know, as I mentioned, those documentaries where people are singing out in the fields, singing at work, singing as they do dishes—there's no instruments being played at that time, that's all just voice. So, it's so important, it's so bonding. It brings you together and you all recognize in that moment that you have a specific role to play, and that the sound of the music that you're producing would not be nearly as rich and as full as it would be if you didn't have that individual. And they can kind of perfect and mold and shape their particular contribution to the singing and it keeps getting better and better and better. It's very, very worshipful. It's very, very grounding. It's very stress relieving. It's so enjoyable. It's such a blessing and I would highly recommend it for your home.
And as I mentioned, Caroline will pick a hymn a month to really learn and to sing with the children. And then if you're learning these hymns, there are times in which we'll be at church and someone will announce a hymn or pick a hymn that nobody knows in all of the hymn book. It's not that it's fallen out of fashion. There's probably a reason for it, but over time you just stopped singing it. And then that, you know, that repertoire of hymns that everybody knows, it just kind of constricts and there are fewer and fewer hymns that you're singing. It's the same hymns all the time. And it doesn't mean that they're bad. They're still beautiful, wonderful hymns, full of significance and truth, but there's also a lot of other beautiful hymns out there and you're starting to lose that.
And if we took that on ourselves in our homes to learn new hymns, that blesses our assemblies. And then the singing is so much richer and fuller. You don't have to be the best singer in the world. That's what I recognized at this event that I went to in Pennsylvania was that you could tell... I wasn't around anyone who I would consider a terribly good singer. I mean they could sing, they're in tune, they are on key or whatever, but it doesn't mean that you would necessarily put them up front to perform a special by themselves. They were just singing with their heart. They were singing with their might and it brought them joy. And I'm not exaggerating. When I was at this event, because everybody was singing like that... And it wasn't their ability and it wasn't their volume, it was the joy that they were experiencing. And I think that's derived from the fact that they all grew up singing from their youth up. And they got the kind of joy and delight that my wife and her family got out of it. They just loved that so much. And I'm not exaggerating—my hymn book was rattling in my hands. That is how powerful the singing was. It was overwhelming. It was amazing. I couldn't hear myself singing. And so that's an amazing thing.
And I think that comes from individual families singing in their homes amongst themselves. And there are so many principles that you could point to as pertains to this issue. This also applies to so many other things that you do in your home. You perfect it in your own, you bring it together to the body, the larger body, and everybody is blessed and benefited by that. But if you're not doing it, then of course, what are you going to get? Well, in the musical sense, you're going to get a lot of droning, very quiet, unenergetic, soulless music. And that's a travesty. It really is. And you walk into an assembly like that... I think in many respects it is symbolic, it's emblematic of where the group is spiritually. It really is. I think it's a sign. You've got to watch out for that. I think the quality of the singing goes down in direct proportion to the quality of the life of the body, and their commitment to the work and to the thriving or lack thereof—nature of their relationship with Jesus Christ.
So revive this in your home if you're not already doing it, and if you are doing it and you've got some children who are kind of struggling with it or pushing back for whatever reason, just keep calling them to the piano. Keep calling them to the circle. Teach them their part, you know, maybe they don't feel like they fit in or that they are contributing. Like show them a part. And that helps them to understand like, oh, if we didn't have you singing this line, we wouldn't have that. We wouldn't have that very unique and specific sound to the singing of this piece.
So I will leave you with that. Singing in your home—so very, very important. Start today or if you're doing it, keep doing it and do it even more consistently than what you're doing it. And I think that you'll find that the joy, the expectation, the looking forward to that activity will continue, will increase in your home. It can easily take the place of things that you are doing that are probably lesser or not as worshipful or as capable of contributing to the welfare of your family, and it starts to crowd that out. It's like, well, we could do this, but no, we'd rather sing. And that's just a wonderful thing. So food for thought. Thank you for being with me today, and I will catch you the next time. So goodbye for now.
Thank you for joining us this week on the Homeschool Solutions Show. You can find show notes and links to all the resources mentioned at Homeschooling.mom. If you haven't already, please subscribe to the podcast. And while you're there, leave us a review. Tell us what you love about the show. This will help other homeschooling parents like you get connected to our community. And finally, tag us on Instagram @homeschooling.mom to let us know what you thought of today's episode. Have you joined us at one of the Great Homeschool Conventions? The Great Homeschool Conventions are the Homeschooling events of the year offering outstanding speakers, hundreds of workshops covering today's top parenting and homeschooling topic, and the largest homeschool curriculum exhibit halls in the US. Find out more at GreatHomeschoolConventions.com. I'll be there. I hope to see you there too.
