HS #259 Welcome to Puberty! with Cynthia Tobias and Sue Acuña

HS #259 Welcome to Puberty! with Cynthia Tobias and Sue Acuña

Links and Resources:

Show Notes:

About Cynthia Tobias

Best-selling author of best-selling books The Way They Learn and You Can’t Make Me! (But I Can Be Persuaded) and featured frequently on Focus on the Family’s Best of Broadcast , Cynthia Tobias has a successful background that includes over 32 years as an author and speaker, 8 years of teaching high school, and 6 years in law enforcement.

Cynthia has written 14 books and is a featured guest on radio and television, a popular presenter for business, government agencies, churches and schools throughout the U.S. and the world. She is the mother of twin sons, now young adults, and she and her husband Jack live in the Seattle area.

About Sue Acuña

Sue Acuña is one of those goofy teachers who enjoys spending time with middle schoolers. She and Cynthia Tobias co-authored Middle School: The Inside Story (What Kids Tell Us But Don’t Tell You), which has led to new adventures as a speaker. She has crisscrossed the country sharing anecdotes and advice on how the classroom experience can be more successful and enjoyable for everyone—students, parents, and teachers.

Sue received her B.A. and M.Ed. from Concordia University, Portland. She currently teaches middle school at Concordia Christian Academy in Tacoma and also directs the choir at St. Luke’s Lutheran in Federal Way. Sue and her husband Paul have been married for almost 40 years and have raised three sons, one of whom is married and expecting a son in June.

Tobias, Cynthia Ulrich and Sue Chan Acuňa. Middle School: The Inside Story—What Kids Tell Us But Don’t Tell You. Colorado Springs: Focus on the Family/Tyndale.


Middle School: The Inside Story: What Kids Tell Us, But Don't Tell You


Show Transcript:

HS EP 259




Wendy -

Hello and welcome back to another installment of the Homeschool Solutions Show. My name is Wendy Speake and I am one of the many hosts we have here on the podcast. Each week, you'll hear from one of us, inviting one of our friends to join for a conversation about this busy blessed season as we educate our children at home.

Now the title of the show is Homeschool Solutions. While we don't have the answer to every question, we know that all the solutions to every stress and every struggle can be found in the Person and presence of Jesus Christ and His living and active and applicable Word. We are so glad that you're here to join us for today's conversation. But before we start the show, I'd like to thank our sponsors.

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Cynthia -

This is Cynthia Tobias.

Sue -

And this is Sue Acuna.

Cynthia -

And you're listening to It's Never Just Another Day. We talk about practical strategies, especially with learning styles, and last time we talked about how to help kids remember things. Remember the information. And how many different pieces of the puzzle might determine what you do best. How you remember best. Today we're gonna talk about how you actually process the information. And what I love about this information today is that the researcher, Herman Whitcan, he was a psychological researcher during World War 2. This is solid, empirical information. But it's really presented in a practical way. I married somebody kinda opposite of me. So, did you do that?

Sue -

Oh, definitely.

C -

Isn't that funny? Cause most people tend to marry somebody opposite because we think it's gonna be a great complement. We see strengths, and then it doesn't take long to figure out that the person that you were drawn to sort of annoys you, because...because we're living proof that our way works.

S -

Right, because what was so fascinating when you were dating can be very irritating when you're married. But, when you understand why they're different, that can be really helpful. What I love about this is it's so practical in the classroom. It can help me understand why this child wants to work alone and this child always wants to work in a group.

C -

And if you've got more than one child, they're totally different. A lot of times. And then they're totally different from you too and it has the potential if you don't understand why it's happening, to just irritate you every single day.

S -

And many of the homeschool families that I know work in co-ops, and so their kids aren't just working within the confines of the home, but they're out working in a group. They're working with other learners and it's really good to understand how both systems work.

C -

So, let me tell you, in a nutshell, kinda what this has to do with. It's really cognitive style, which means, how you process information. This isn't necessarily personality or temperament. It's really how your mind takes in information, makes decisions about it, processes it. It's very interesting because the research shows that about 50% of the world, I mean, the whole world. It is kinda divided fifty-fifty between the mind that processes information when it comes in, to kinda automatically look at details, process things in order. And then the other 50% of the world has a mind that doesn't do that naturally. Our minds step back, take a look at the big picture, try to figure out where we are. It's kinda the real simplification, like the forest and the tree.

S -

My favorite simplification is looking at how people work jigsaw puzzles. There's one type of person who always puts the frame together first. Needs the picture handy. Needs to know exactly what this is going to be. And the other person who dumps the pieces out and says, look, a whole bunch of yellow. I'm just gonna start with the yellow.

C -

Yeah, that's how...and you know, I have twins, of course, we've talked about that before, that are just two minutes apart. You'd think they'd be very similar. And even though they're identical, they're opposites. Right? So, the way Mike processes information and the way Robert processes information totally different. But they're in the same home, with the same parents, growing up at the same time. So, it's important to be able to be able to recognize and not be as irritated as it can potentially make you.

The two ways that we're processing, we call them...in the research, they've got more complicated names, so for our purposes, we're gonna talk about the analytic mind, the analytic-cognitive style, when information comes in, versus the global big picture context. Now, for our purposes here, Sue is very definitely the much more analytic mind. Right? I mean, when the information comes in, what do you do with it?

S -

I wanna know the beginning, the end, you know, my brain is organized more alphabetically. I keep a calendar pretty much going in my head all the time. I can tell you how far out something is. But when you've got information, what are you doing with it?

C -

Well, I'm a big-picture global person. So, I'm trying to figure out, where we going? I'm looking at the thirty-thousand-foot view, right? I'm going, well, where are we gonna end up? And my analytic teacher is saying, you'll know as we get there, let's just follow...I just...I have to have context. I have to know, what are we supposed to do? A classic example I can remember from being a student is when my analytic teacher would say, everybody, take out a piece of paper, number one through ten. And I'm looking around going, what are we doing? We're taking out a piece of paper, we're numbering one through ten. And then I'm saying, well, but, why? Because I told you to take out...I'm not trying to be a smart-alec. I'm just trying to figure out, what is this? Is this a test? Is it a quiz? Am I supposed to skip a line? I have no context. I have no orientation. But that doesn't actually really occur to you as much as an analytic, does it?

S -

I wanna know am I gonna be graded for this? Is there going to be more of it? When is it due? But, I will tell you, as the analytic part of this team, our plan today was, to talk first about one type of learning, and then talk about the other type of learning. And then we're going to compare and contrast them.

C -

Is that right? Because that wasn't written down.

S -

Yeah.

C -

And if it was written down...???

S -

Well, so let's talk about the...it is my job to keep us on schedule. Always.

C -

And that's what...and that's the analytic compliment. It's just like right hand, left hand. Each one has a part. You wouldn't want two right hands or two left hands.

S -

But, yes, this is where we definitely wanna make that point. Nobody is completely analytic, and nobody is completely global. You might be...and some people are actually right in the middle, fifty-fifty. But it is good to know which you're more comfortable with and which you lean to more.

C -

I got kind of an itty bitty analytic piece and a great big global piece. And Sue kinda keeps...reels me in sometimes, and keeps me on track.

S -

But I'm really more fifty-fifty, so...

C -

That's true.

S -

...I need to be the analytic part of this team. But in a different group, I might be the more global person.

C -

Right. That's true.

S -

But I'll take the analytic side.

C -

Okay, so let's talk about the analytic strengths. If we are talking about a person who's prewired to be more analytic when the information comes in, and what they do with it, talk about the analytic, Sue.

S -

Well, first of all, I need to know, when is this...when's the beginning, and when is it going to end? If I walk into a conference, and there's no schedule, I am immediately frustrated. I'm just flustered. Because I need to know what the structure is.

C -

Does it have to be in writing? The schedule?

S -

It's helpful. Because I like to be able to refer back to it.

C -

Okay.

S -

Because my memory, my memorization type is much more visual. I wanna know the expectations by the time we're done. I will know this and this and this and this. I want to be sure that we're sticking to the plan. If you skip, number three, and go on to number four, I'm no longer listening, because I'm wanting to raise my hand and say, 'scuse me, 'scuse me. I...we need to go back to number three.

And we have seen this happen in our speaking sessions, where a parent will raise a hand and say, I'm sorry, um, you skipped number three. And we immediately go, ha! We know you...your favorite learning style.

I know in my classroom, especially, I see my analytic learners. They wanna work independently. They don't wanna be held down by anyone else's agenda. They don't wanna do any chitchat. Let's just get in, get the job done. And turn in a very good project. In fact, they're very task-oriented. Much more project, task-oriented.

C -

See, I'm kinda different than that. Apparently. I wanna look at the big picture. I'm not actually interested in the details until I know what the details are gonna mean in the end. And so, I wanna just get an overall sense of it. In fact, I've been known to go start a good mystery novel, read the first couple chapters, and then skip to the end to see.

S -

Ah!!

C -

See if I like how it's gonna end. Cause why would I wanna do the whole thing if I don't like it? And you know, you wanna do one thing at a time, and you wanna have this orderly process, but I'm kinda prone to spontaneity. I wanna go by inspiration, and so I might be the kid who interrupts and asks, well, what about this? Well, I'm getting there. I just have to write...and I...when I started teaching, my very first year of teaching, I just thought the analytic kids that came in were just too, they were wound too tight. You know, they ask me all these questions. What time? Or where are supposed to be? And what are we supposed to do? And I...and how long is it supposed to be? And do I use blue or black ink? And what am I supposed...and I would just think, you know, life's too short. You've just gotta relax a little. Here's the general idea. Not realizing that for the analytic, that that's not irritating. They're not trying to be irritating. They're really pretty cast adrift, if I just say, well, you'll know eventually, and we'll get there, and don't worry about it. The analytic's just going crazy, right?

S -

Yeah. And I have found that global learners are far less schedule-oriented. You know, we'll get it done when we get it done. And the analytics are looking at the watch, going, you got ten more minutes. We really gotta get going, well, I got ten more minutes.

C -

It's interesting, though, cause that...with deadlines, that's true. We like kind of a more general, you know, ish, deadline. But for being on time, it's...I have a theory. Now, you can tell me whether or not this is true. But my theory is that the analytics are late more often than the globals are because when it's time to go, as a more global person, I can just drop everything and go. But, the analytic, if you're in the middle of something, it's not like you can't finish it later. You've got to go ahead and finish this one thing and then go. Is that kinda true?

S -

Well, and...you and I and our relationship, we found that out to be true. Whereas you will arrive fifteen minutes, half an hour early, and some of that is because you wanna get to know the other people that you might be working with. I tend to arrive right on time or even five or ten minutes late, because, you know, by golly, the schedule said we're gonna start then. I'm not gonna show up way ahead. So, you know, there's a lot of truth to that.

C -

??? husband is just stressed out if he has to suddenly stop doing something and just go. And he just, he can't quite get his head around that. And for the global, we really...you like to work alone, on independentlies, and I hear this a lot from my analytic students, you know, they don't wanna be reliant on somebody else for their grade. But I like group projects. We globals, we like group projects. We like being able to collaborate. We like having consensus among each other. We like being able to kinda share the load. You don't like to do that as much as the analytic?

S -

No, because someone else might bring my grade down. Or there might be too much chitchat, which is hugely distracting, and then we're gonna run out of time, because, like I said, I know we have a schedule. And if I can decide for myself, I'm going to do this first, and then I'm going to do that, and then I'm going to do that, and stick with that. That's very comforting.

C -

You can really see, in homeschooling, how this would be a challenge. Although, probably, the chances are good, especially if the two of you, as parents, are teaching together. You might be able to be a great team, because you might have one kid that really needs this, and the other kid that really needs that. It was most revealing for me, and having to deal with a whole bunch of different styles, and that the analytics in my classrooms. I would have to just stop and say, okay, I'm gonna let you use a code word and when I didn't give you enough information, or it's detailed enough, just say, you know, fog bank, fog bank. Whatever you want...so I can slow down. Because I'm not trying to annoy you. It just doesn't...I don't think about it. I wouldn't need that much detail, so why do you? Or, I need all this detail, and I want you to do it to. And here again, we go back to a really important question that you'll hear me say, over and over, over time. And that is, what's the point.

S -

What's the point?

C -

What's the point? What am I trying to teach this child? Okay, and when you can agree on what that is, then you say, how many different ways can we get there? Do you need a study buddy? Do you need a partner? Do you need no noise? Do you need some noise? Do you need more explanation, or do you need to just try and get started?

Let's talk about frustrations. I think, especially for the more analytic kids, your frustrations are kinda different than mine.

S -

My frustrations are being forced to work in a group. Not knowing specific directions. I remember having an art class, as a college student, and he gave us a very general set of expectations, and I couldn't even begin. Because how could I meet expectations that hadn't been given? So, not know exactly what I'm supposed to do is frustrating.

Scheduling, we've talked about. Lack of organization, we've talked about. That will frustrate me. If I have been listening to a speaker who starts off...one thing that really makes me nuts is a speaker who says but we'll get back to that later, and then they never do. Because I'm waiting for that point. So, all those things can drive me nuts. Yeah. Not having a clear sense of where we're gonna go.

I was at a conference last fall and the speaker said, well, I'm open to whatever topics you wanna talk about. And I almost walked out. Because if he didn't know, I knew it was just gonna be a rambling session. I didn't think I wanted to be there.

C -

Before I understood this, you know, I...my analytic kid would put his hand up and go, wait, it's like you said, Sue, you said there'd be three, and there's only two. And I would say, oh, did I say there'd be three? Well, let's just make two. Right? And it's...this short circuit that, no, if you said there'd be two, three, then you have to have three.

S -

And now I have anxiety because I can't trust that what you said we were going to do is actually going to happen.

C -

Right. Cause even my boys, you know, when they were younger, and Mike would be the one that says, okay Mommy, what's the plan? And I'm thinking, the plan, let's see. The plan. I was kinda thinking that we would kinda see as we go. Cause Rob's very comfortable with that. But for Mike, no, I need a plan. What's the first thing and what's the second thing. And again, I wasn't trying to annoy him, but it hadn't occurred to me that, you know, for him, I really have to have at least a brief outline. A general plan.

S -

And you know what really stresses out an analytic is a big wide open day without a plan. Without a schedule. My firstborn was very analytic. And he was just difficult to deal with during summer break because he didn't know what his days were supposed to be shaped like. So, we sat down and we made a schedule. Well, this is reading time and this is chore time, and this is outside time. And we posted it. He didn't always follow that schedule, but the fact that it was there gave him great comfort. So for an analytic learner at home, to have a schedule, even though one of the beauties of homeschool is flexibility, but to have a schedule available, even if you don't always stick to it, can help your analytic to feel grounded and centered.

C -

And for the global, I think if you're spontaneous enough, or at least flexible enough to say, well, we don't have to do it that way, but here's the bottom line. See, this has to be done. What other...if you've got another idea for doing it, let me know. Cause then, a lot of times, I'll say, no never mind, I'll just do it. But I don't feel like it's so cut in stone.

S -

Right.

C -

And I think, between the analytic and global, the organization process is very different. This is a big one. Oh my goodness. But, how do you organize yourself as an analytic?

S -

Well, it's nice to have a planner. It's nice to be able to go forward and backward in time and see, well, if this is happening two months from now, then I probably need to get started on this now. I like to just look way out ahead and at least have a general idea of what's going to happen on what day, or what's going to happen in what month. I like to write down lists, so I can cross them off as I go, by my planner. You know I used to have a nice physical planner and now, of course, it's all on my phone and I'm pulling it all the time and say, well, let me just look at this. Let me write this down.

C -

Yeah, see that's...that doesn't really describe me.

S -

A little constricting for you, isn't it?

C -

It's a little different for me. I kind of...you know, the know the analytics tend to work in...with files. And I tend to work in piles. Because, as a global person, I've got all my stuff kinda spread out because, if I can't see it, then I don't think about it, right? Or, even on my computer, I have a lot of icons on the desktop because, if I file it away, I won't remember what I called the file. I won't know how to find it. And I...it can be very annoying to the analytic in your life. You can ask my husband. To have stuff all spread out and yet, I know where everything is.

S -

And what did you teach me? What's the time limit for being able to find it?

C -

If you can find what you need in sixty seconds or less, you're organized. And that's interesting because it's...you know, you want...a lot of times, especially if you're an analytic parent, you like organization, and you like it to look neat. So you want a notebook. You want the planner. You want the things in certain categories. And it's just difficult for me, as a global...I can eventually do that, but then I probably won't find it, cause I won't remember what I did. My big drawback, as a global person, is I'm really drawn to organization systems. Oh, the beginning of the school year, you know, you can go to all those Rubbermaid things that I can walk down an aisle and think, oh, that would be great to put this in. And I'll put this in the red one, and this in the blue one. And then by the time I get home, I'm kinda out of the mood to organize. And so, the empty Rubbermaid things go in the closet and I just go back to my old stuff. This is...just drives my husband crazy.

S -

And I've had analytic students who will buy book covers. I mean, people don't even always use book covers anymore, but they'll buy those nice elastic book covers, in colors to match the spiral-bound notebook. So I had a student who's science book was covered with yellow, and the spiral-bound notebook was also yellow. And math was red, and social studies was blue. And it stayed that way all year, and when one of the notebooks got full, she went and bought one in exactly the same color, because that was what helped her analytic mind to keep track of things.

C -

One very analytic teacher came up to me after one of my seminars a while back, and she said I like things the way I like them, and I tell my students, you keep this notebook. Everything has to be in a category. Everything gets put in that category. And she said there was this one kid, he never had a notebook with him. He just, he came in and he kinda sat in a desk and he had this fatigue sort of jacket on with a whole bunch of pockets. And she said, I was so frustrated that he wouldn't come up with a notebook, she said, one day I said, okay, everybody, pop quiz. Leave your notebooks when you go. And I'm gonna check 'em and I better find every single category and every single section just the way it should be. Every paper where it should be. And so everybody left their notebooks on their desks, except this kid, who just kinda shrugged his shoulders and took his coat off and left it on the back of his chair. And she said I walked over there thinking, oh boy. And she looked in the pockets of his jacket, and every single pocket was a different category, and every one of the categories had the right papers in it. And she said, argh! I didn't wanna give him an A, it doesn't look right. It doesn't look neat. And yet, for him, it...what the point was, was being able to keep track and keep those papers in there. And sometimes we forget that.

S -

And I had a student who, sometimes a paper would get stuffed in the back of his desk. Sometimes it would go into a backpack. Sometimes it would get left in his locker. He finally came up with a system that was simply a small cardboard box, and he carried that box from class to class, because every paper went in it, and when he needed something, he just had to shuffle through the box, and there it was.

C -

And it's frustrating to an analytic parent though, isn't it? Because you want to keep it in a certain way. We are living proof that our way works.

S -

Right.

C -

And so we tend to think that way, and we tend to wanna demand that. And sometimes it just, it isn't worth fighting that battle. As long as you can get the outcome that you want.

S -

And I think the beauty of homeschooling is, you don't have to have a binder with divider sections that has to be carried from class to class. You can have a system of shelves or even a system of different spots on the desk to put things. It can be very flexible based around the student's needs.

C -

And because the global is more to be group-oriented, I wanna have...I don't work well as a global child doing my homework all alone. Sitting quietly at a table. Cause, I see other people having a whole lot more fun than I'm having. So, what we found in our household was that with Robert, for example, if we could all just do some sort of work at the same time he needed to do his homework, right? We would all, in fact, maybe I'm working on writing something, and his dad's working on this and Mike's working on that. Nobody's talking to each other necessarily, but we're all focused on work, and no one's having more fun than Rob could get his work done. So, a lot of times, that's motivating.

S -

But, for an analytic learner, that's just distraction. That's just keeping me from concentrating. I can't focus. I don't understand what I'm reading. And so, to allow a more analytic learner a quiet space off by himself, off by herself, where there are no distractions. And so a really important question you can ask your learner is, do you want some company? No, no, no. Keep away. I need to just be alone to be able to focus on this. Or, yeah, can I just come work at the dining room table? It tells you a lot right there.

C -

Right, and I think understanding here, where awareness is half the battle. When you...if you understand what you are and how your mind works, and if you can get your child to understand what they are and how their mind works, it's very freeing and it's...it builds confidence. Cause you know, let's face it, I think that the education system as a whole is pretty analytic. Wouldn't you say? I mean, from the beginning of time.

S -

Because when you look at a student who has a neat desk and an organized binder, and a schedule posted right where they can see, you think, oh, that's an A student.

C -

Right. And, you know, I tell the story of my friend Debbie, who is just the opposite. She's highly analytic. And we're...we can go to the same movie, watch the movie, at the end of the movie, if you ask, so what was the movie about. She can tell you everything. I mean...

S -

And who directed it and...

C -

Yeah..

S -

Other movies made by the same company.

C -

Pieces...and then, you turn to me, who watched it with her, and ask me the same question, what was the movie about? And I go, it was great. It was a love story. This guy and this girl and they sort of broke up in the middle cause he was a jerk. And then in the end, they got together, it was a wonderful movie. I really liked it. Really? Who played the part of the guy? I don't know. He plays in one of those sitcoms. Well, where was the movie filmed? Big city. Tall buildings. Snow on the ground. You didn't tell me ahead of time that there was gonna...that I was gonna have to tell you in a quiz, on the movie. If you had said before I went into the movie, I'm gonna ask you at the end, who starred in it and where it was filmed, I could have told you. CAuse I would have paid attention to that and I'm not stupid. The thing is is a global kid, a lot of times, I feel like I'm not as smart, cause I don't automatically listen for the details. And one of the best things you can do for me, as an analytic parent is, tell me ahead of time what I should be paying attention to, and then I'm gonna feel a lot smarter because I will have paid attention to that, and I'm not, you know, it just...my analytics seem to make me feel, as a global kid, like I'm not quite as intelligent as studious. You don't do that on purpose, do you?

S -

No. No, but I will say, for a parent of a global learner, it is good to provide a study guide. To say watch for these important points. Whether they're reading or watching a video, or on a website, look for these important points. Because, as you said, then it's so much easier to focus on what's important. But what about the whole working together as team, when you get a group of analytic learners together, they're going to divvy up the jobs. They're going to make every part work together so that we can be as efficient as possible. For an analytic learner, they're very task-oriented and they tend to look unfriendly. But what we want you to know is, we're not being unfriendly. We can be friends later. We can chat about that movie later. Right now, we need to focus on the task at hand and get it done because there's a time limit. There's a due date. These are the checkpoints we have to hit. Let's focus on that. We can all be friends later.

C -

Work first, then fun.

S -

Work first, then fun.

C -

Well, but, the globals were going, life is short. You might not have this opportunity again. Work will always be there, but what about this opportunity with a friend that comes up and it's interesting, isn't' it?

S -

And I've watched global groups get together and the first thing they do is learn everybody's names. I'm not sure that's important. But you need to know your names, as long as I know what? You're a good writer. Awesome. We're gonna have you take notes.

C -

Oh, and a lot of times the group says we just wanna share a few stories and just kinda get to know each other a little bit, and then boom, the time's up.

S -

Yeah, and then...

C -

See, I did that boom just for you.

S -

...find out...find out, find out what y'all have in common. And the analytic group is over there looking at... chug, chug, chug, chug, chug, chug, chug. And they are never going to finish in time.

C -

That's right. Well, and I don't know, you know, it's...as a global, I appreciate the analytics. I mean, if I'm absent from school, and I have to get the notes from somebody, I'm not going to another global friend, as much as I love them. I'm gonna get the notes from the analytic.

S -

You know what else is important to me as an analytic is having a clear rubric. How am I going to be graded on this? It needs to be very objective. Because I wanna know that the work that I did and the work that you did, and the work that that guy over there did, that it's all going to be graded exactly the same way. And...

C -

Man, I hate rubrics. They're so complicated, and all that...you have to fit things into a tight little category and box, and for my global mind, it just drives me crazy, cause I just wanna...let's just do it. Let's just, let's kinda go with this and see where we head. And, both of us could be equal in intelligence, right?

S -

Absolutely.

C -

Both of us competent in our job, in what we do.

S -

And at the end, both of us could have learned the same amount of information.

C -

Totally. And yet, we can be misunderstood as we go, just because, maybe the opposite person didn't understand that you could do it a different way and still get to the product.

S -

And I like to watch the great British baking show on Netflix. And when you watch that, that is so much fun to watch, how the analytic baker goes through step by step by step. But if something goes wrong, they're all in a fluster. And the global baker has a pretty good idea where they wanna go, and if something goes wrong, they tend to be able to adapt a little better. This was my experience with a co-teacher where he was much more analytic than I was. This is...I had to be the global half of that team. And he would schedule field trips months in advance, but if something happened and we couldn't take that field trip, he was at a loss. So I remember one year our field trip got snowed out, and I said, you know what, we'll show a movie. The money that the kids brought to buy their lunch on the field trip, we'll pool together and buy pizza. And he was relieved, and it was a good balance.

C -

We really do need each other.

S -

We really do.

C -

In my book, The Way We Work, I have a little comparative list. A list analytic learners and global learners in contrast about what they value. So, let's just kinda go through that list and you can play the analytic part. Because that's what you are. And I'll play the global part. And this is what we value in general. Analytics value...

S -

Results. We wanna know that we turn out a really good project.

C -

But I...we want credit for effort.

S -

We value working independently, just let me do my own thing.

C -

No, I wanna work with a group. With others. I wanna have that energy.

S -

We value precision. First one, then two, then three, then four.

C -

We like flexibility, you know, room for just a little grace.

S -

We value objectivity. I want you to rate my project based on the scale that you're comparing it to.

C -

I wanna be able to explain why I didn't exactly do it the way you said. I wanna just be able to explain my reasons.

S -

We value efficiency. We don't wanna waste any time, just get to the point.

C -

You know, we think it's more important to have high morale and teamwork, and it's all for one and one for all, and it might not be exactly precise and efficient.

S -

We want systematic methods. We said we were going to do it this way. Let's stick to the plan.

C -

Yeah, but we love ideas and creativity and there's nothing better than having an a-ha moment.

S -

We value analysis. Is this the correct way to do it? Are we following the best path?

C -

We value enthusiasm. You know, as long as I'm pretty excited about it, and if I'm enthusiastic about it, let's just go with it.

S -

So when the project's done, we're going to look at it and say did we follow our steps? Did we stick to the plan? Is this what was expected?

C -

We're gonna say, that was great. That was such an enjoyable experience. We really oughta do that again. Now, in a way, this makes us sound, right, it makes the global sound like they're not as serious about learning.

S -

And it makes us sound like we're not very much fun.

C -

Yeah, but that's not true, right?

S -

Well, and as we said, nobody is purely one piece or the other. We analytics, we've turned out a great project. Let's all get together and celebrate. Let's go have lunch together.

C -

And you know it's...it can be frustrating and yet, really rewarding as a parent if you can look for ways to incorporate both. And you don't' have to think of this yourself. Again, ask the questions, why do you think this is frustrating you? Do you think...is it too much detail? Do you...would it help if I...

S -

What do you need before you can get started? Do you have all the pieces?

C -

Right.

S -

Do you want some company?

C -

No.

S -

Do you wanna work alone? I'll find space for you.

C -

Right. And, because sometimes, if you ask them, what do you need, they aren't gonna know. But giving them some suggestions might help. Also, in the I Hate School, How To Help Your Child Love Learning, and in the way we work, even on the website, we give you lots of examples and some ideas for really being able to talk to kids of all kinds of learning.

S -

And again, as always, as a parent, understanding yourself and your preferred methods and then realizing how that either meshes with, or clashes with your child's learning will be huge.

C -

They might even actually appreciate the person you married just a little more too, huh? The important this is, you do learn what you need to learn, and you appreciate that every single person has a different way of doing things. That's why it's never just another day.




Wendy -

Thank you for joining us this week on The Homeschool Solutions Show. As always, you can find show notes and links to all the resources mentioned at Homeschooling.mom. I hope you'll take a moment to subscribe to the podcast and, if it was especially meaningful to you, share it with your friends, via email or social media. This is just another way we can all encourage and love and support one another.

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